Thanks to a former colleague and fellow cinephile (better known by her twitter alias @tami_ava), I learned of the announcement of a remake of Point Break. Yeah, that’s the one where Keanu tries to catch the late great Swayze’s gang of bank robbing surfers. What? You never heard of it!? Come on, it was a recurring tongue-in-cheek gag in the movie Hot Fuzz.

If you’re still drawing a blank then consider yourself lucky. You’re not missing too much. The movie didn’t bring much to the table for both Keanu and Swayze and for the most part it was a mediocre release that had some fans (I’m looking at you, surfers and stoners!) So this begs the question; why does Point Break need a big screen redo? I’m noticing a common thread within Hollywood bigwigs as it seems like remake’s are all the rage.

And this is only the beginning. This seems to be just another title in the seemingly endless list of new/old movies. So far we’ve got Footloose, Dirty Dancing, Arthur, Straw Dogs, Spider-man (the original is barely a decade old), Judge Dredd, Total Recall (don’t mess with the three boobed alien), Conan, The Crow (I’m really pissed about this one), Dune, Fright Night, Heavy Metal, Clash of the Titans and Tomb Raider to name a few. Most of these movies didn’t have huge box office numbers, or lauded as masterpieces. But they all eventually found a niche crowd that gave it the popularity and success it deserved. But does that mean they really need to be re-made.

It was the simplicity of a lot of these films that gave them the eventual fan base. I remember the first time I saw The Crow,  I started wearing a trench coat and listening to NIN and Joy Division non-stop. That movie made me really explore the depths of love and loss and gave me the opportunity to be all teenage-angst in a way that was truly me. Even though I didn’t like the casting in the 2002 version of Spider-Man, it was still exciting to see one of Marvel’s giant’s on the big screen the way I imagined it. And that movie also opened the door to other great super-flicks like Iron Man and Batman Begins. Some of these classics used real make-up, effects and stunts that didn’t need computer generated highlights. It was creative in its trick cinematography and inventive special effects.

But Point Break and Footloose!? Keanu and Bacon must be rolling over in their future-graves. I’m sorry Hollywood, but you need to shape up and start telling new stories. I don’t want to be 80 and watching the 10th remake of Rocky starring the great-grandson of Sylvester Stallone as Rocky and Justin Timberlake as Paulie.

Although Timberlake would lend his vocals to a new Rocky soundtrack. I wonder what his version of Eye of the Tiger would sound like?


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